Dr Peter Alsop – It’s My Penis/It’s Only a Wee Wee.

Yes, unlike Doctors John, Fox and Gillian McKeith, the man who wrote these songs really does have a Ph.D. – in educational psychology. According to his website, “His songs are used by thousands of parents, doctors, educators and other human service professionals to help families discuss sensitive issues such as sexual abuse, disabilities, loss and grief, codependency, self-worth, chemical dependency and family violence.” Quite how lines like, “What’s that hanging there between my legs?/It looks like a sausage between two hard boiled eggs”, are supposed to help solve chemical dependency I don’t know. I guess that’s why he’s got a Ph.D. and I’ve got an NVQIII in Nail Jewellery.

Alsop’s has been writing songs aimed at children since the 1970’s. Songs with such diverting titles such as Safari Up My Sister’s Nose. However, in 1997 he released a double album Songs On Sex and Sexuality aimed at an older, although not necessarily more grown-up, audience. But the gently didactic tone of his children’s songs is still very much in evidence.

It’s My Penis is a celebratory song to counter all the people who have been down on the penis. Not like that – you’ve got a sick mind. It’s Only A Wee-Wee blasts against sexual stereotypes. Something I entirely support - gender shouldn’t determine anything more than how carefully you do up your fly. It also contains the great line, “Let’s all be abnormal and act like ourselves”.

Just for the sake of trivia; Alsop’s father-in-law is William Auge Geer who sang with Woody Guthrie and Burl Ives in the 30’s but is best known for playing the fantastically named Zebulon in The Waltons.

I hope no one’s been offended by this week’s posts and the terrible innuendo. I felt the need to go downmarket after all that international politics.

There’s better things to discuss

Indeed there are, Doc. Next week: boobs.

Peter Alsop – It’s My Penis

Peter Alsop – It’s Only A Wee-Wee

Buy Songs On Sex and Sexuality